Regular readers of the great sage's scribblings now have the opportunity to decide his fate.

Should Beijing This Month keep him for another year or get shot of him?

If we receive 12 phone calls in support of his wisdom to Guo Meng by February 19 at 6715-2374, then the boss will reluctantly agree to re-hire him. If not, Lao Ma will go the way of all things and be sent to join his great celestial master in the sky.

Rat

They don't name the race after you for nothing. Running around that great big wheel all through this Dragon year, there may be times when more humble rodents might feel like they are getting nowhere fast. But take heart, a little self-esteem can carry Rat farther and faster than rivals and in bed before midnight.

Ox

Lumbering into the dragon year, work will take on a tedious repetitive strain. Dumb oxen may be tempted to move further afield, seeking pastures new. Lao Ma says look out! Those exciting new opportunities also present daunting fresh challenges.

Tiger

The wonderful thing about Tigers are Tigers are wonderful things: Bouncy and exuberant one minute, gloomy and despotic the next. This is all part of Tiger's unique charm, ands something to treasure and own, not seek to avoid.

Rabbit

What's up, doc? Prudent bunnies better watch their health this Dragon year as all those extracurricular activities may take their toll. Watch that vitamin E.

Dragon

This is your year. What that means depends on you. Some treat Dragons like they have been extinct for eons, but this year, more than any other year, is the chance to prove them all wrong.

Snake

For single snakes, this is the year to consider stepping out from under the rock, making a commitment, setting off for sunnier climes or settling down with that special someone. For married Snakes, the same applies.

Horse (1942 - 1954 - 1966)

Sheep (1943 - 1955 - 1967)

Monkey (1944 - 1956 - 1968)

Rooster (1945 - 1957 - 1969)

Dog (1946 - 1958 - 1970)

Boar (1947 - 1959 - 1971)

Lao Ma would like to point out one last time, his predictions are just for fun, folks. u opportunity to decide his fate.

Horse

Foreign Horses' fear of dragons should be quelled by a firm bottom in the saddle. The new year should see you feeling frisky, so grasp the whip of freedom, apply it briskly to the backside of destiny, and head for the far horizons.

Sheep

The fortuitous combination of a Dragon year and Valentine's Day promises at least one explosive erotic experience for certain sheep. It could singe your fleece right off. Unlucky sheep should take a cold dip.

Monkey

The clammy hand of Mammon grasps you by the throat and tries to choke free will from your body. Canny Monkeys should use their opposable thumb to pinch the big M's backside.

Rooster

This year you should wake up and realize just what a big Cock you are. Puff that chest out, strut your stuff. It's boss time, so act the part. Delegate all menial tasks to overworked underlings while you Do Lunch.

Dog

In a moment's weakness, the arbiter of the Universe has acceded to a request from the Cosmic Cat that Dogs should be relegated from the Astrological Premier League. Check Beijing Scene for your forecasts from now on.

Boar

Accelerating global pollution improves the quantity, if not the quality, of your diet this Year of the Dragon. In terms of lifestyle, garbage pickers and sewage bathers can expect their options to just grow and grow.